Beggars Can’t Be Choosers – Or Can They?

I received notice that my house was being sold so I had to find somewhere else to live.
It was my forever home. I was gutted. I was stunned. I was scared of the miserable
market out there and tears became my companion – day and night for two weeks.

I felt displaced. Disheartened. Sad. Grieving. Unsure of where I was going to land.

Pressed. Squeezed. Bent into Shape – or Not.

That old familiar voice, the one I’d heard off and on throughout my life: “You just have
to take what you can get.” “You should have bought that home when I told you.”
“Beggars can’t be choosers.” “What else can you do, you have to find a home in less
than two weeks.”

I had more notice than that but it got down to two weeks, and close to one!

Now, about that voice. It was “their” voice, not “mine”. Through all of my tears, I searched and I looked within to know, to see, and to be able to speak the truth for me. And this I got as clear as day: “Don’t be afraid, the house will find you.” Yahhhhhhhh!! I knew it instinctively. I knew.

My response to that voice: “No, I do not have to take what I can get. No, I should not have bought the house. I made the right choice. I am not a beggar. And I do have a choice.”

That is power. Self-empowerment. Superpower. Inner strength – whatever you want to call it. It

was mine. I am not defined by another’s noise, or their uncertainty, doubt, fears, lack of

understanding or belief. Phew!

The Lies We Tell Ourselves (or others tell us)

→ When under pressure, I have to cave.

→ When all else fails, just take it!

→ I won't have a safe place to land.

→ I will have to settle for second best.

→ I have no choice.

→ What if I just have to take it because that’s all there is?

The Truth – My Truth

→ People speak their internal noise – not mine. I know me.

→ I am the Expert of Me – not someone else.

→ I'm not a beggar – nor do I have a beggar mentality.

→ I do have a choice – that is my superpower.

→ I listen to my internal whisper – not the doubt and fear of others.

→ My truth is mine – it opens up unlimited possibilities.

Why Does It Even Matter?
Why wouldn’t it? It’s not just about needing to find a home. It applies to every area of our lives. We encounter lies and truth according to other’s perspectives, opinions, pointed fingers – but what lies within me is all that matters.

It matters because my mana motuhake is MINE. It is my strength. My power. And my gift to share with others. It is my cut-through in my mahi – to empower and enlighten others with what is true and right for them!

Finally, if it doesn’t matter – then neither do you.

Believing is holding on even when it feels like all odds are against you. It is listening to your

inner self – it is more often than not a gentle whisper, not a loud voice or noise saying this and

that. It’s about crying if you must, grieving, feeling, being – and when you hear your “the house

will find you”, then you know it is true for you “ahakoa te aha!” No matter what!

The House Did Find Me
Two weeks to find a home. I saw it and I knew it was the one. But thought it was too good to be true and out of my reach. I reached out anyway – gave all my deets. Got a response – the dates to move out and move in – did not align. My heart sank because I knew it was the one. I thanked them and told them I couldn’t take it because of the timing.

One week later, got a text saying to this effect: “We would like you to move into the house, we can make it work.” Wow. The house came back and FOUND ME. Yahhhhh!

Magic. Alignment. Flow.

It all happened. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom-boom!

Your Takeaway

If you can take something from this, let it be:

→ I am my own person, and not another’s.
→ I do have a choice in all areas of my life.
→ It’s okay to cry and grieve and feel – just listen quietly to the voice within.
→ Trust it will all align and when it feels like it isn’t – you believe it anyway.
→ Dare to hope against all hope. When all else seems to be failing, I will yet hope.

That’s who we are here at Whanganui Counselling Services. That’s the mahi we do. That was personal to me – but it’s universal to all. Listen to your voice and if you're not sure – Ask within.

You are your own superpower!